Tools for a Balanced Lifestyle

A Program of Recovery from Weight Related Problems
Going for the 3 increases: Increase of Health; Increase of Happiness and Increase of Energy

Chapter 2: Exercise to Live

II. Exercise ANGER Workout
The cavemen and cavewomen most probably experienced times when they got angry with and because of the exercise and activity involved in their fight for survival. They may have become angry with their inability to spear their food source targets on the first shot, which certainly would have ticked them off. They may have been diverted from their food source search by inclement weather which would most probably make them howl at the evil spirited "Weather Source. " They may have stubbed their toes or wrenched their ankles which could have drummed up some rage in those prehistoric bones. They may have been diverted from their hunt activities because of the persistent harassment of their rival mountain side community members. The continual put downs, embarrassing comments or taunts might have gotten the best of these cave dwellers and make them so angry that they focused more of their energy on revenge schemes than on their hunt. Worse yet their source of food might have been eliminated from their neighborhood forest due to natural disasters such as fire or draught. They would most probably be filled with hate towards the "Spirits of Nature", as they picked up camp to find more fertile hunting grounds. What we do know about cavemen and cavewomen though is that if they let their anger take them over and drain them of their emotional energy they would eventually be in a bad space in terms of their survival. They could not afford to remain angry too long or else they would slack in their hunting activities and exercise and find it difficult to survive.

We like our cavemen and cavewomen predecessors can not afford to be so angry at the concept of doing increased physical activity and exercise that we sap our energy and never get to doing it, thus imperiling our own survival. What we need to do is to rid ourselves of our exercise related anger on a daily basis so that we have the emotional energy and motivation to partake in our survival and life sustaining activity and exercise.

You might be saying to yourself at this point, "This is pretty silly. I am not angry at having to do exercise. Why exercise is ok. I don't have anything against exercising. I am not angry at exercise." If that is the case, then why is it that you do not currently have a healthy level of exercise which can sustain a healthy lifestyle? What is blocking you emotionally from motivating yourself to engage in this necessary and vital act of life? What you need to do is to become honest with yourself about anger in your life. You are angry at something related to exercise, or else it would be an important part of your life at this time. Human beings usually do not engage in activities about which they have anger in their hearts. Anger blocks the emotional response to doing things which are healthy or desirable to do. What you need to do is to rid yourself of anger related to exercising, no matter what form it comes out in you. You need to do an ANGER workout on a daily basis until a healthy routine of exercise becomes an habitual part of your life.

First you need to Accept that you are angry over exercise related issues or else you would have it as a normal healthy part of your life at the present time. Get out of denial about the role of anger in holding you back from accomplishing a balanced lifestyle for yourself. It is normal and human to experience anger about the importance and need for exercise and increased physical activity in your life.

Second you need to Name what you are angry at concerning exercise and increased physical activity. What follows are some suggestions of issues or subject matter which might arise anger, hatred, rage, revenge or other forms of anger in you as you face the need to implement a plan of exercise in your life to sustain a healthy, life extending lifestyle.

Suggested Anger Issues Related to Exercise

• I hate exercising.
• It is so boring.
• I never get to see immediate results, from exercise, in weight loss or reduced body size.
• It takes so long to get and keep my body in shape through exercising.
• I dislike the pain involved in exercising when I first get started in it.
• I despise the notion of "No Pain No Gain."
• I don't like to exercise.
• I don't have enough time to exercise.
• Exercise is so time consuming.
• Exercising takes me away from things I would rather be doing.
• I'd rather sit and think about exercising than really having to do it.
• I hate that exercise is a "have to do" in my life in order for me to live a healthy life.
• I feel forced into exercising.
• I feel it is a plot of the fit and shapely people in the world to reek revenge on us "fatties".
• I don't like the sensation of having to breathe so hard while exercising.
• I don't like having to sweat while exercising.
• I hate that exercise is so structured, routine and regimented.
• I dislike that exercise is something that everybody else who is in on the "know" is doing it.
• I dislike that the need to exercise is lifelong, continuous and forever.
• I dislike the fear that something bad, like a heart attack, will happen as I exercise.
• I don't like that exercise makes me sweat and stink.
• I hate when others can look so great when they exercise.
• I hate that others look so happy and have such big grins on their face when they exercise.
• I dislike having to wear different clothes to exercise in, it is so inconvenient to have to change.
• I hate that there isn't enough "bang for the buck" in exercising because there aren't enough calories burned and that inches don't drop off of me immediately after I finish exercising.
• I hate that exercising is so complicated when compared to reading and thinking.
• I dislike that exercising has become so social so that the "cute" and "pretty" people do it.
• I hate being asked to exercise with thin or "in shape" people.
• I hate not being asked to join in the exercise event because I am so fat or out of shape.
• I can't see a need to exercise unless there is a point to it, like training for a competition or marathon.
• I dislike this notion that exercise is as vital to living as food, air and water.
• Exercise cuts into my TV time, social time, telephone time etc.
• Exercising makes me feel self-conscious cause I feel like others are looking at me.
• I hate how good others look when they are exercising, they seem so good at it.
• I hate that there is so much sensuality and sexuality present in health clubs.
• I feel like I am at a "meat market" or dating service when I am at a health club.
• I resent that all those "in shape" and thin people crowd the health clubs leaving no place for me to fit in.
• I hate the feeling, that I will die early in life, if I don't exercise.
• Why can't there be something else, than exercising, which I have to do to be healthy and live.
• Although I am doing it, I still hate it.
• Why can't it be more fun, interesting, less boring?
• I hate that my initiating of my exercise program has become a joke to the important people in my life.
• I hate that I used to enjoy exercising and now that it has become a burden to me.
• I hate the thought of others making fun of me while I exercise.
• I hate the taunts, nagging, sarcastic comments, and prodding of others to get me to exercise.
• I don't believe that exercise is necessary to maintain a healthy lifestyle and I object to this coercion I feel to exercise in this program.
• I would rather go on a diet to lose weight than to increase the amount of exercise or physical activity in my life to get in shape and lose weight.
• It takes too long to achieve my body size goal in exercising.
• It just doesn't seem that to exercise would ever become enjoyable to do.
• I feel like I am being forced to exercise in order to remain in this program and I feel it is unfair.
• I hate exercise because of the people in my past who exercised and the horrible way they treated me and made fun of me for being so out of shape, uncoordinated or fat.
• I hate people who have a" better than thou" attitude and make me feel stupid for not exercising, because they have lost weight, gotten in shape and are maintaining a balanced lifestyle by exercising.
• I resent people who exercise and are healthy.
• I resent people who have been successful by using exercise to reach their goals of good health.
• I resent people more successful than me in achieving their balanced lifestyle.
• I resent personal trainers.
• I resent experts in exercise physiology.
• I resent this program's emphasis on exercise.
• I resent the implicit message that I am a failure in life if I don't exercise.
• I hate being forced into doing exercise which I don't like and don't want to do.
• I am resistant to exercising and I wish we could talk and read about something else.

Third, once you have named what you are angry about, you then need to Get It Out by aggressive anger workout activity. For this exercise workout, you are encouraged to do the following:

1. Purchase a 40 pound karate kick bag. You can get them at any sports store.

2. Hang the bag from a rafter and use sparring gloves on it. Or lay the bag on a coach, chair or floor and use a whiffle bat, an aluminum T-Ball bat, plastic bat or a bat made from rolling newspaper up and strapping it with plastic tape so that it is firm and easy to hold.

3. Once you have your bag and anger workout implements, set aside at least five minutes each day for the next few months to do an anger workout on exercise related issues.

4. Take one of the issues listed above or any issue real to you which raises your anger, resentment, rage, hatred, etc concerning exercise.

5. Visualize the issue, and begin to look at the image of the person, place, condition or situation related to the anger issue as if it is on the bag.

6. Begin to hit the bag while yelling and screaming out your anger and rage against the person, place, condition or situation related to the exercise issue which is the target of your anger.

7. Keep hitting and yelling until you feel your anger lessening or abating. It is good to do this for at least five minutes. You can go as long as you want. Don't stop until your time is up or you feel your anger has abated.

This "getting out" activity is exercise in itself. So you can get angry over the fact that to get anger out of yourself concerning exercise requires that you to do some form of exercise.

Fourth, once you have gotten your anger out you will feel Energized and ready to Resume your efforts at implementing a program of exercise or increased physical activity in your life so that you will be healthier and more fit for life.

As you work at lessening your anger you then need to go on and do some CHILD work to give yourself a new healthier emotional response to the need to exercise.

With kind Permision
James J. Messina, Ph.D., & Constance M. Messina, Ph.D.Copin www.coping.org